I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
