Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
