she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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