I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
