You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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