guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
