...so i touched it.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
