You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
