And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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