I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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