weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
