I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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