at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
