He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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