I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
