That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
honey bunches of taint.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
