East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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