I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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