can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
