I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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