You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
My cat gives me a boner
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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