drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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