She is in my trunk
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Randomize
