Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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