Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
