I puked a lego.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
