i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
i out mim tonsoeep
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