Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
