She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
