8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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