wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
