I understand Curling. That high.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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