i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
