But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
