I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
