i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
