you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
