Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
