Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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