I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
We have started to decorate penises.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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