true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
So much rum. So many feels.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
