So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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