fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Randomize
