talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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