Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize