Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
