He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Randomize
