I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
