your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
