I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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